423 BC

THE CLOUDS

by Aristophanes

anonymous translator

CHARACTERS IN THE PLAY -

STREPSIADES

PHIDIPPIDES

SERVANT OF STREPSIADES

DISCIPLES OF SOCRATES

SOCRATES

JUST DISCOURSE

UNJUST DISCOURSE

PASIAS, a Money-lender

AMYNIAS, another Money-lender

CHORUS OF CLOUDS

THE CLOUDS -

(SCENE:- In the background are two houses, that of Strepsiades and that of Socrates, the Thoughtery. The latter is small and dingy; the interior of the former is shown and two beds are seen, each occupied.) -

STREPSIADES (sitting up)

GREAT gods! will these nights never end? will daylight never come? I heard the cock crow long ago and my slaves are snoring still! Ah! it wasn't like this formerly. Curses on the war! has it not done me ills enough? Now I may not even chastise my own slaves. Again there's this brave lad, who never wakes the whole long night, but, wrapped in his five coverlets, farts away to his heart's content. (He lies down) Come! let me nestle in well and snore too, if it be possible... oh! misery, it's vain to think of sleep with all these expenses, this stable, these debts, which are devouring me, thanks to this fine cavalier, who only knows how to look after his long locks, to show himself off in his chariot and to dream of horses! And I, I am nearly dead, when I see the moon bringing the third decade in her train and my liability falling due.... Slave! light the lamp and bring me my tablets. (The slave obeys.) Who are all my creditors? Let me see and reckon up the interest. What is it I owe?... Twelve minae to Pasias.... What! twelve minae to Pasias?... Why did I borrow these? Ah! I know! It was to buy that thoroughbred, which cost me so much. How I should have prized the stone that had blinded him! -

PHIDIPPIDES (in his sleep)

That's not fair, Philo! Drive your chariot straight, I say. -

STREPSIADES

This is what is destroying me. He raves about horses, even in his sleep. -

PHIDIPPIDES (still sleeping)

How many times round the track is the race for the chariots of war? -

STREPSIADES

It's your own father you are driving... to death... to ruin. Come! what debt comes next, after that of Pasias?... Three minae to Amynias for a chariot and its two wheels. -

PHIDIPPIDES (still asleep)

Give the horse a good roll in the dust and lead him home. -

STREPSIADES

Ah! wretched boy! it's my money that you are making roll. My creditors have distrained on my goods, and here are others again, who demand security for their interest. -

PHIDIPPIDES (awaking)

What is the matter with you, father, that you groan and turn about the whole night through? -

STREPSIADES

I have a bum-bailiff in the bedclothes biting me. -

PHIDIPPIDES

For pity's sake, let me have a little sleep. (He turns over.) -

STREPSIADES

Very well, sleep on! but remember that all these debts will fall back on your shoulders. Oh! curses on the go-between who made me marry your mother! I lived so happily in the country, a commonplace, everyday life, but a good and easy one- had not a trouble, not a care, was rich in bees, in sheep and in olives. Then indeed I had to marry the niece of Megacles, the son of Megacles; I belonged to the country, she was from the town; she was a haughty, extravagant woman, a true Coesyra. On the nuptial day, when I lay beside her, I was reeking of the dregs of the wine-cup, of cheese and of wool; she was redolent with essences, saffron, voluptuous kisses, the love of spending, of good cheer and of wanton delights. I will not say she did nothing; no, she worked hard... to ruin me, and pretending all the while merely to be showing her the cloak she had woven for me, I said, "Wife you go too fast about your work, your threads are too closely woven and you use far too much wool."

- (A slave enters with a lamp.) -

SLAVE

There is no more oil in the lamp. -

STREPSIADES

Why then did you light such a thirsty lamp? Come here, I am going to beat you. -

SLAVE

What for? -